We Want to be Maidens!
by KaibasVeryOwnPinaColada
Summary: Kaiba and Joey are on a quest...to be beautiful maidens! So they go and ask Tea, the all knowing sorceress of Teletubbies for help! Rated for yaoiness.rnCOMPLETE!
1. The Very Beginning

Joey walked down the snowy sidewalks with his really demented hair all flattened out.

Kaiba then walked up.

"Hey, sexy," Joey squealed. Kaiba grinned with delight.

"Have you ever thought about becoming a beautiful maiden?" Kaiba said thoughtfully, eyes staring into space.

Joey nodded. "Yes, actually. But what I really want is to be an astronaut.."

Kaiba recoiled, hurt. "But...we could be maidens together!"

Joey thought about it, and then hugged his life partner. "You're right! Let's go ask Tea the magic sorceress of all Teletubbies to turn us into maidens!"

Kaiba agreed and they skipped, holding hands, gaily to Tea's house.

Yugi and Tristan and Tea were in the front, having a tea party with their dolls.

Despite the odd looks of innocent bystanders, Kaiba and Joey walked up to them and said, "Good day."

Yugi and Tristan said, "Hiya, dudes!"

Tea nodded. "Good day." She paused, then added, "Why have you come to my secret volcano lair?"

Joey fidgeted, and Kaiba said, "Well...ya see...we wanna be maidens!"

Tea grinned. "Hey, I can do that!"

(Insert Teletubbies theme song here...)

Should I continue?


	2. PIZZA!

So Tea stood up and said, "Moo!"

And** POOF**, they were in...

**France!**

Tea gasped. "_WE AREN'T SUPPOSED TO BE IN FRANCE_!"

Kaiba and Joey walked up to a little girl.

"Excusez-moi, mais où l'enfer sont les pizzas?!" Joey asked the girl, named Emilié.

Emilié shrugged. "Demandez à Bob, vous perdant! Qui l'enfer sont vous?!"

Kaiba looked dazed. He quietly turned to Tea and said, "Joey knows French?!"

Tea shrugged. "Apparently."

Emilié turned to Kaiba. "He wants to know where the pizzas are."

Kaiba bit his lip, then said, "Over there." He pointed to a guy selling pizzas.

"PIZZA! SEULEMENT TROIS DOLLARS Un PÂTÉ EN CROÛTE!" the pizza guy shouted.

"Yay! Pizza!" Joey yelled pervertedly. He ran up to the pizza dude, took out three dollars, and said, "Une pizza, sil vous plait!"

"Voici que vous allez!"

"OUIAS!" Joey cried, and brought the pizza to Kaiba and Tea.

MEANWHILE...

Mokuba ran to Tea's and saw Tristan and Yugi, looked dumbfounded.

"What happened?!" Where's Seto?!" He said.

"Tea said, "Moo!" and then they disappeared!" Yugi cried.

"Eh, shit happens. Gimme some tea!"


	3. Mai

So Tea stood up and cried, "FORGET THE DAMN PIZZAS…" she paused, then added, "Hip hop and a tequila shot, be yet in France not!"

And, suddenly, they were back at Tea's house!

"Whew…I'm never going to try that again!" Tea gasped, relieved.

Kaiba stomped his foot. "BUT…WE WANT TO BE MAIDENS!"

Joey threw a tantrum.

Mokuba got up. "You two are acting very…**strangely** right now."

Kaiba shrugged and knelt down beside the smaller child. "Mokuba, I never told you this, but I'm in love with Joey."

Mokuba rolled his slightly amused blue-gray eyes. "As if I hadn't all ready figured that out, you moron!"

Kaiba began to cry like a sissy. "GOD-A! I'M JUST-A SAYING-A!"

Then, VOILA! Mai appeared! She was dressed in a black tuxedo and a black top hat.

"Yo!" Mai said.

Kaiba ran up to the cross dresser. "Mai! Can_ YOU_ help Joey and me become beautiful maidens?"

Mai shrugged. "I-I don't know," she stuttered, then added, "but I will try! Follow me to my beautiful house to try on different costumes!"

Joey sat up and wiped his eyes. "Mai?"

Mai looked down. "JOEY!"

Then Bakura ran up! "What the bloody hell is going on here?"

Joey sniffed and held out his arms. "I need a hug, Bakura."

Kaiba was outraged. "WHAT ABOUT ME! YOUR SOULMATE! YOUR OTHER HALF!"

Joey sniffed again. "GROUP HUG!"

And Bakura, Kaiba, and Joey all hugged.

Mai scowled. "Well? Are you two love buddies coming or not?"

The three of them looked at each other. "Make it the three of us."

Mai sighed. "FINE! JUST GET YOUR ASSES OVER TO MY HOUSE, DAMN IT!"

And so the went.

_A/N: This was the WEIRDEST chappie I've ever written…_


	4. Maidensat last!

So Joey, Kaiba, and Bakura skipped happily, holding hands, to Mai's house.

Mai took them to her large backyard.

There they waited as Mai unveiled a large closet. Inside were long, white dresses, and wedding veils, with flowers and purple dresses and pink dresses.

Kaiba was enthralled.

"Joey! We…we can finally be maidens!" Kaiba cried, busting into tears at the beautiful sight.

Bakura and Joey leaned against Kaiba, fighting back tears of their own.

Mai sighed in aggravation. "COME ON! TRY ON THE CLOTHES ALREADY!"

Kaiba flounced over and picked up a pink dress. He sniffed and put it on.

He looked like…a maiden.

_EPILOGUE:_

_They all became maidens, meaning Joey, Kaiba, and Bakura._

_Then the lived happily ever after._

_THE END!_


End file.
